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I only today found out about Spencer's father dying.


Eric Blair
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38 minutes ago, Xena said:

Since Spencer’s father is not a well-known public figure and Spencer did not announce his father’s death here perhaps a private message to Spencer would have been more appropriate.

What an asinine comment !

 

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It's not an asinine comment at all. I had a friend and neighbor who died last year when she was up in Canada. Her daughters notified her close friends here but asked that we not make it public- they really didn't want it to be the talk of the town, bandied about by a bunch of people who hardly knew her. It's up to the relatives whether they want things like that posted on a public forum. 

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10 hours ago, Xena said:

Since Spencer’s father is not a well-known public figure and Spencer did not announce his father’s death here perhaps a private message to Spencer would have been more appropriate.

I thought Spencer may have mentioned it since I assumed he went to the funeral and mass in California.

And even if Dick wasn't well known, I wanted to make public my respect and admiration for a very nice man and his wife.

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5 minutes ago, Eric Blair said:

I thought Spencer may have mentioned it since I assumed he went to the funeral and mass in California.

And even if Dick wasn't well known, I wanted to make public my respect and admiration for a very nice man and his wife.

We are a community here, we're all connected and your response was one of kindness and respect. We all know Spenser, even if only from his postings and I as well wish to convey my condolences at this important time for him and his family. You'd think after All Soul's Day we would all have a more philosophical look at death and dieing. Eric , in my opinion , did the human thing of acknowledging this important milestone in Spenser's life and including our community. I only hope that when it's my turn to go I won't be ignored and that my friends and acquaintances won't think I'm just on a trip somewhere.....

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Yes, he did a fine thing, but all this BS being kicked around about it is moronic and hurtful. A simple, respectful RIP would have been sufficient. I can hardly wait for the death of one of my family to be debated in a public forum, as if the death itself was inconsequential, because people somehow believe it is now their right to ignore another person's right to privacy.

And if anyone thinks that not having a public debate about your death is "ignoring" your life, then you didn't have any friends and acquaintances of consequence in the first place... people that would have quietly and respectfully contacted your family in the usual manner.

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The entitlement in this thread to discuss another person's bereavement without permission or invitation is astonishing  to me. Being lectured on how we should be enlarged by the existence of All Soul's Day is personally offensive.

I usually talk myself out of posting on this forum when I'm ticked off. Probably should have followed my rule here.

 

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37 minutes ago, ComputerGuy said:

Yes, he did a fine thing, but all this BS being kicked around about it is moronic and hurtful. A simple, respectful RIP would have been sufficient. I can hardly wait for the death of one of my family to be debated in a public forum, as if the death itself was inconsequential, because people somehow believe it is now their right to ignore another person's right to privacy.

And if anyone thinks that not having a public debate about your death is "ignoring" your life, then you didn't have any friends and acquaintances of consequence in the first place... people that would have quietly and respectfully contacted your family in the usual manner.

Ugh. There is so much coming and going here that sometimes these important events are missed. We all have many good friends that are only here part time. i doubt any of them would know how to contact my family and also doubt that my family would mind if my death was acknowledged. Its not like Eric gave out any sordid details, only expressed him condolences and put it out there for anyone else to do the same. What side of the bed did you wake up on today?

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I am not talking about Eric's post. I am talking about the unnecessary blather following it. Debating it. Chewing it up. Ignoring the sensitivities of others.

I would be happy to dissect all the comments, but I am breaking my own rule concerning this discussion. I am out. Spencer, my apologies and condolences.

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8 minutes ago, Al Berca said:

Spencer posted regarding his father’s death on his FB page on October 28 along with a photo of his dad. He received 70 comments of condolences and well over 100 sadness emojis, so it has been made public information by the family weeks ago.

I did the same when my mother died in March at the age of 98, with a retrospect of her life in pictures and in one of my groups to pay homage to her art. It beats a tiny notice on the back page of a newspaper.

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On 11/21/2019 at 8:13 AM, ComputerGuy said:

I am not talking about Eric's post. I am talking about the unnecessary blather following it. Debating it. Chewing it up. Ignoring the sensitivities of others.

I would be happy to dissect all the comments, but I am breaking my own rule concerning this discussion. I am out. Spencer, my apologies and condolences.

 Any elaborations beyond sending condolences is in very poor taste and insensitive.  Thank you for pointing that out CG.

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