MtnMama Posted June 30, 2018 Report Share Posted June 30, 2018 Sometimes you need to admit you need help. That you can’t do something all by yourself. That realization came to me this week and I wanted to share my thoughts. My husband has been ill for several months. The last few weeks he has been getting markedly weaker. Unfortunately he is macho and stubborn and refused to use a walker because by damn he wasn’t an invalid. After falling more than a dozen times in a 5 day period, his back and hips were so sore that he couldn’t get out of bed or sit up. I finally admitted I couldn’t take proper care of him myself. With help from Dr Sam and his wonderful wife Mari, I put my husband in a residence home for a hopefully short period of time. We chose a new facility, Happiness Care Residence in Riberas. He actually listens to the pretty nurses when they tell him to drink liquids. (Me he ignores) He is having a great time flirting and retelling his favorite stories. And his back is getting better. I like the fact that this is a small casual facility where they encourage him to eat when he wants – no breakfast is served from 8 – 9 only – and offer the flexibility we need right now. They offer daily and weekly rates and will help me get him to his doctor appointments. So if a loved-one needs care you are not able to provide, especially short term care, don’t be ashamed to ask for help. Know that there are a variety of options available locally. And if someone is so ignorant as to say, “you put your husband in a nursing home? How awful. I kept my mother at home. I would NEVER put someone in a nursing home.” You have my permission to slap them silly. http://www.happinessresidence.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferret Posted June 30, 2018 Report Share Posted June 30, 2018 Excellent advice! We should all be so caringly logical. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiny Posted June 30, 2018 Report Share Posted June 30, 2018 I also had to ask for help with my mother. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WideSky Posted June 30, 2018 Report Share Posted June 30, 2018 Damn, hope the stubborn so and so will realize, once he is home, that he ain't no spring chicken anymore. We may be super women but at some point we have to say enough is enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tingting Posted June 30, 2018 Report Share Posted June 30, 2018 The ignorance of complete strangers, along with their swift willingness to share their opinions, never ceases to amaze me. I think it takes a very strong person to understand that not everything can be handled at home. Your husband is very lucky that you cared enough to make that decision. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope your hubby makes a very swift recovery ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kam Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 MtnMama - thank you for sharing this - may we all have/or be partnered with someone with your good sense! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cedros Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 Good post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WideSky Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 14 hours ago, Tingting said: The ignorance of complete strangers, along with their swift willingness to share their opinions, never ceases to amaze me. I think it takes a very strong person to understand that not everything can be handled at home. Your husband is very lucky that you cared enough to make that decision. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope your hubby makes a very swift recovery ! I happen to know the poster and her husband so No I'm not a stranger and I can certainly empathize with MtnMama's plight (she knows my situation). MtnMama will understand my comment and likely get a chuckle out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferret Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 I don't think Tingting's comment was directed at you, Widesky. I think she was commenting on the last sentence of Mtn. Mama's OP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luvsdawgs Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 Sorry to hear of your problems, you made a good decision and one which was best for the two of you. Often the frail one only thinks of him/herself and not the other person. Once one is in the shape he was in it is easy to fall and break something. Best wishes for better days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tingting Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 4 hours ago, Ferret said: I don't think Tingting's comment was directed at you, Widesky. I think she was commenting on the last sentence of Mtn. Mama's OP. You're absolutely correct, Ferret. Thanks for pointing that out. I was just agreeing with MtnM's comment: And if someone is so ignorant as to say, “you put your husband in a nursing home? How awful. I kept my mother at home. I would NEVER put someone in a nursing home.” Why do so many folks think it's their place to point out what they think is the error of the ways of others? It's hard enough to have to make this kind of decision, with all of the normal second-guessing, without having someone adding a sh*tload of guilt on top of that, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WideSky Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 mea culpa y lo siento Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MtnMama Posted July 1, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 And WideSky, I did get a good chuckle out of it. Thanks 😄 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tingting Posted July 1, 2018 Report Share Posted July 1, 2018 NP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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